Guess whose back?

What the world needs now is love.

Hey gang,

I’m going to try to get passed the epic arborial collision that was my commute to work today, and harken back to Monday night, which was a good date night, and even more interestingly, a good night for shedding light on just how many of us are feeling lost in this 21st century dating game.  As I mentioned in my first entry, I made this blog for myself as a way to document my interesting Los Angeles interactions with subjects ranging from USC Marine Bio PhD students to aspiring film makers from Philly. However, almost everyone I have told about this blog, from good friends to friends of friends, married, in a serious relationship, or single, has been pretty excited about it. I was even asked to review someone’s dating profile and suggest any revisions I found helpful. Have I been giving off the impression that I’m really good at dating? I think incredibly skeptic and mocking enough to stave off any possible disappointment is more accurate. A friend in a relationship also said she was jealous of my ability to have a bizarro dating life to blog about. To that I can only say: http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m5qcxrvJDk1qcbg1zo2_500.gif

Soooo Monday. I decided to take the metro to (yet another) Irish pub first date. This time the location was Hollywood and, in case you don’t have your notes with you, the subject was one Persistent Pedro, a Tinder match whom I had made plans with before deleting the app, then reconnected with upon redownloading the app and finding a slew of messages that had been sent over my three week absence including: ‘Whose the first person, fictional or historical, that comes to mind when you see the name Charles?’, ‘Hey, Liz. Wanna get a game of Catan going?’ and ‘Do you watch Ted Talks?’. Charmed. I knew literally nothing of PP before the date, besides that he was a big Jurassic 5 fan, lived in Koreatown and really liked board games. I actually confused him with another Tinderer I had been chatting with weeks earlier who worked at Hot Topic, and may have seriously insulted him when I asked if Hot Topic gave him the day off for Columbus Day. Whoops. A rookie mistake. I have known people who take screen shots or even pasted the text of OKC profiles to remember details about the million people they are talking to since OKC allows you to see every time someone views your profile and we all want to pretend that we aren’t tempted to re-browse someone’s profile to find possible conversation topics or in case we missed some type of terrible red flag that they might be cannibalistic or Tea Party members. That is unless you get ritzy with that ish and become a paid member, allowing you to enjoy anonymous profile stalking and cigars sent monthly to your home.

Refusal to pay for a dating site is just one of my many principals when it comes to navigating through the digital dating world. Just for your own reading pleasure here are a few more: 1) I will not message or respond to a message from someone who has a picture with his shirt off if there is not a pool or sandy beach in the photo. 2) Sorry you don’t have more pictures, but seflies and particularly MIRROR selfies are a ‘terribly wrong’. 3) I will not message or respond to a message from someone who claims to be an aspiring actor/screenwriter/director/producer unless they seem to have an interesting enough personality to counterbalance this. This alone cuts down about 70% of the L.A. dating pool. 4) You will get negative points for listing Eastbound and Down under your favorite t.v shows. 5) You will get infinite points for mentioning the Talking Heads or Magnetic Fields under your interests.

So- I got to the metro a little after 6:00 pm. Waited for 15 minutes or so while two trains passed on the opposite track. Typical. And tried not to look too much at a cute, tattooed skateboarder who chose a bench next to mine. Transferred at 7th St onto the wrong line, then deboarded (how is deplane a real word and deboard isn’t?) and waited for the red line. At least three others had made the same mistake, and got off with me. One was a guy in his late 20s who asked me how he could get to Union Square. I told him he was heading in the wrong directions, and that his would be the train after mine. We chatted for about 5 minutes, he was an aspiring actor/USC grad student who wanted to know if I partied a lot in Spain. The only reason that this is worth mentioning is because this NEVER happens. This type of impromptu conversation with a stranger. I mentioned to a friend a few months back that given all of my friends leaving L.A. and the fact that I’ve already met most of my friends’ friends, I only meet about one guy a month who is under 30 and single. I have gotten to the point that such trivial meetings as this on the platform of the metro with a male human being see me turn into a blood hound sniffing out possible hookup/relationship potential. Alas, I got on the next train, said goodbye and what could have been will never be! But wait- homie’s personality was a 5, face was a 6, and he was an aspirining actor. Sometimes the rarity of being flirted with in person gives one an attention high whilst dulling the mind and the senses. X’d.

Made it to my stop, Hollywood and Vine, and noticed the cute skateboarder from my Culver City stop had made the same transfer and ridden in the same car as I had. As we made our way through the turnstiles a few steps from each other he pointed out that we’d made the whole trip together. I told him I didn’t even know where I was going and was just following him. Learned that he worked in Culver but lived in Hollywood and was metroing while his car was in the shop. As we got onto the street I asked him where I could find the bar I was meeting PP at and he walked with me to it (I think it was on his way and was only about 100 yards from the metro). He said it was kind of a douschey bar, then I said I hoped the guy I was meeting for a first date wasn’t too douschey. Skateboarder asked if a friend had introduced us, and I told him that no, in fact this was the work of Tinder. He admitted to being on Tinder too, but had never actually met up with any of the girls he’d talked to on it. He also mentioned being on OKC and ventured that the experience must be a lot different for girls with all the messages we get pouring in. I said goodbye to the skateboarder at the corner and hoped that maybe our meeting would push him to give a Tinder girl a chance. Spreading good will left and right.

Called PP from outside the bar, he was already inside, and the audio from the Dodgers game being shown on the first floor could be heard from both mine and his ends of the call. First impression: PP is really cute. Good smile, and amazing first hug. We sat down in a corner where the game was still in sight and started talking about work. I learned that he works for an immigration advocacy org that we did some collaboration with at my old job (slash year of service…). Kind of amaziiiing piece of info since I have really missed that work and being in the middle of this exciting, albeit glacially paced, move towards Comprehensive Immigration Reform. I also learned that PP went to Cal, whom our own UCLA had slaughtered in football a few days before. This was more than conversation fodder. This was common interests and interesting convo. After debating whether or not to take PP up on a round of car bombs (and caving) things may have gotten sickeningly Nick and Norah  (let the records show that I haven’t seen the movie but LOVE to make uninformed judgments) and we exchanged phones to browse each others’ music selections.

Crazy families were discussed, drinking problems, proposed Game of Thrones story lines, being middle children and God knows what else from 7:30 pm to 11:30 pm when PPs brother came to pick him up. Points for not drinking and driving. We headed out together and I refused a ride since the metro was just across the street. Hug goodbye shifted and morphed into a kiss goodbye that was sweet and short. PP asked/told me to call him, I nodded yes, then walked to the crosswalk where I would stand awkwardly and wave as PP and his brother drove past me 5 seconds later.

Once I got onto the metro platform I was approached by a guy who asked if I liked hip hop and was about to pull out his headphones to play me his album. Slightly buzzed, and to the point, I told him that I sometimes did like hip hop but that I didn’t have any cash on me to buy his C.D., then we fell into conversation. Turned out Mr. Hip Hop was also from San Diego and went to Bonita Middle. He asked what I’d been doing that night, I admitted to having had a first date. When prompted I told him it went well and that we had met online-ish. This threw Mr. Hip Hop into a 20 minute soliloquy about the girl he loved and how she was into exciting things like online dating but how worried he was about her because it’s dangerous- doesn’t she know that it’s dangerous? Mr. Hip Hop was initially adorable, withdrawing into himself and talking about how much he missed her smell, and everything about her. But at around Wilshire/Vermont things took a weird turn when his monologue shifted and he was claiming that we were living in the first level of hell and God didn’t go give us all his glory, now did he? At this point, I really just wanted to ask if it was too late for me to have a listen to his C.D. Lost Mr. Hip Hop when I transferred to the expo line, but I did counsel him to reach out to his girl again.

Unfortunately, my next first date, a hike which was scheduled for Sunday, has been postponed. Fortunately, one fantastic jungli billi is visiting from the Yay Area and an amazing One Heart Source fundraiser will be happening Saturday night so I shant have the time nor the sobriety to hike Sunday. Hoping to reschedule, cause this one, Great North, (from the bay and went to college in Canada…) seems pretty chill. However, there will likely be a second date with PP before that happens.

Number of texts exchanged with PP since Monday night: Too many. Cannot break my cardinal rule of not building a relationship over text that will not translate in person.

PP’s sign: Pisces. Understanding, easygoing and accepting. (Um, shouldn’t I be a Pisces? #selflessfordayz). Comforting with an aura of quiet empathy. Love match with Cancer: Both are water signs, the match is a calm meeting of spirits. Shared emotional depth. We’ll see. (Credit: www.astrology.com)

Wish everyone had forgotten about: My prediction that RB would contact me by Sunday and I would have to break his heart by denying him a second go at excavating my mouth. He hasn’t contacted me yet. Maybe my amicable nodding was just boring?

Nightzees.